Thoughts on Christmas

I used to like Christmas but now I don't know, ‘cause sometimes I just can't help but feel

Like Christmas isn't really this amazing time of year, but a time to be fake and hide feelings that are ugly but real.

'Cause I look around at Christians I know, and around December they're all laughs and smiles,

But inside I honestly don't think I feel the same. I look at myself and my struggles and trials,

And I don't know if I can genuinely put on that smile. It seems like it's just a mask of holiday cheer,

And I don't think God's about using some cheesy December tradition to cover my doubts and fears.

I call myself a Christian but I sometimes wonder if this is really all God intended, ‘cause if it is then I don't know

If I want to do this whole "Christmas" thing—just a chance to hide and put on some show.

 

There's nothing wrong with smiling but I don't think I can, because I feel so distant from God and I'm stuck,

Climbing through a valley, with a steep hill ahead—I’m in pain, I'm hurting, I'm all out of luck,

So how can I put on a smile and pretend it's all fine, when all I really feel is abandoned by this God who,

Supposedly, is loving, faithful, just and kind. God, tell me, how is it that this can be true?

I'm waiting to be rescued, I need to know that there's more than carols and cookies and halls all decked.

God show me there's more because I'm through with this. I need to know that when I get through this trek, 

There'll be sunshine at the top of this long hill ahead. So maybe this is what Christmas is supposed to be for,

Finding rescue and hope in this Savior, to know, beyond the trials and the hurts, that there's so much more.

 

There's comfort in knowing that this isn't it. All the pain and sorrow is alright to feel,

Because there's a God who knows, He's been there too. If I'll just wait and trust He's worth a great deal

To know that Rescue has come and is coming again, amidst all this suffering I'm feeling right now,

With jingle bells ringing and Christmas approaching, Jesus still knows what I feel and gives hope somehow.

That because He came, because He was born, because He died on that cross and rose again,

He gave me life beyond the trials and pain. God, You give me comfort through redemption,

And in my doubts and fears and hurt and rejection, I'll cling onto this hope that Jesus gives.

So thank You, Jesus, thank You for coming. Thank You for the hope that gives me inspiration to live.

Thank You for coming and living and giving away. Thank You for coming and crying my very same cry.

Thank You for coming and suffering for my sake. Thank You for coming while knowing at the cross you'd die,

To give me a love that is better than life.

 

So even when I do see through corny holiday cheer,

Into my own sorrowful, self-pitying, and selfish tears,

I can trust that there's more to hope for, through You, Jesus Christ,

So thank You, Jesus, thank You, for everlasting life.